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Guess which screen shot is of CNN’s U.S. Edition and which is their International Edition.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

If you picked Exhibit A as the CNN international Edition you are correct. If you picked Exhibit A as the CNN U.S. Edition, well, you’ve probably spent too much reading CNN U.S. Edition. And become retarded.

Big Ern’s Totally Scientific Breakdown:
U.S. Page: 29 items, 22 of which are sensational, prurient, or otherwise dumb. The number is that low only becuase I get excited for I am Legend, and iPod Accessories. I also gave the benefit of doubt to the Time quotes, and the CNN Wire, yielding a domestic mongoloid index of 0.76.

International Page: 22 items, only 10 of which stink. International mongoloid index: 0.45.

Popular U.S. News Topics: Steroids, dog fighting, murder, promiscuity, and the antics of primates. (Technically, all of these could be filed under the antics of primates.)

Popular International News Topics: Global warming, international diplomacy, terrorism, and cloned cats (apparently these are a hit everywhere).

The Moral Lesson Herein:
Live in the U.S and want to become famous? Shoot up a dog with steroids then make it fight a gorilla. Consider copulating with the winner and killing the loser.

Live elsewhere and want to become famous? Speak up on global warming or broker a peace between contentious parties. Or make glowing cat clones.

Maybe folks are dumb all over.

I realize this story is a week old (online), but I just saw this on TV. Apparently, there is a condition called hypertrichosis, “which causes [the] body to produce an abnormal amount of hair everywhere”. So, hence the picture on the right side of this post. This picture doesn’t do what I just saw on TV justice. He was much hairier, so he obviously shaved his face for this picture.

A bit more info…genetics:
“Genetic research has linked the condition to the X chromosome. That means if a woman carries the gene, she has a 50-50 chance of passing it on to her offspring, whether she has a boy or a girl. If a male carries the gene, 100 percent of his female children will be affected, but none of his sons.”

A bit more on why it may have happened:
“We believe that this is a gene which was functioning a long time ago in the evolution of man when primates were becoming men,”…”as humans evolved, certain genes that were unnecessary for survival mutated and were turned off. Figuera believes that, in Danny’s family, the gene for hypertrichosis was somehow accidentally turned back on.”
So, evolution took a step backwards in this case…

If you want to read more about the hard lives of Danny (pictured) and his brother Larry, about how they started out in a cage featured in a freak show, about how they went from that to (and are currently in) a Mexican circus (is anyone shocked by this fact?), or about how Danny has children and a girlfriend who is down with his hairiness, go to the ABC News Article.

If they post video or I find any online, I will definitely post a link to it. Or please add a link in the comments if anyone finds video on it.

He really does look like a werewolf….

UPDATE: I found a video on YouTube, not from ABC, but on the same family.